Jin of Displayblog (2010)

Sung to “Gee, Officer Krupke” from West Side Story (1956)

This was my entry to win a used IBM T210 monitor (the best 21-inch LCD ever made) from Jim Kim of http://www.displayblog.com. I didn’t win. Sorry the subtitles' timing got out of sync,

First, the original song, Gee, Officer Krupke:

And now, Jin of Displayblog, featuring the music and open captions; sorry, I never recorded vocals.

Lyrics

GEE, JIN OF DISPLAYBLOG (THE IBM T210 SONG)

Lyrics © 2009 Paul Franklin Stregevsky,

Hey, you!

Who, me, Jin Kim?

Gimme one good reason I should give my IBM T210 monitor to you!

SOM-MM-MM-MME PEOPLE LIKE A PUFF A'

THE TEA THAT GETS 'EM HIGH,

BUT I CAN'T GET ENOUGH-A'

THAT PRECIOUS DPI.

SO ON THIS IDES OF AUGUST,

NO MATTER HOW OR WHEN:

WRAP AND SHIP ME YOUR BLINKIN' T210!

GEE, JIN OF DISPLAYBLOG, YOUR CHOICE IS A CINCH:

HE NEEDS A HUNDRED TWENTY-SEVEN PIXELS PER INCH.

DON'T THINK HIM NEUROTIC,

OR LOOSE IN THE LID:

DEEP DOWN INSIDE HE'S JUST A KID.

JUST A KID!

HE'S A KID, HE'S A KID,

ONE COMPLETE, SWEET, KID,

SO FORGIVE, AND GIVE IT TO THE KID!

That's a touchin' good story!

Lemme blog it to the world!

Just tell it to Judge Jin.

I-I-I-I'M JUST A WORKIN' FATHER,

BEHOLDEN TO THE BANK,

MY OUTLOOK'S IN A BOTHER,

MY NEST EGG'S IN THE TANK;

MY DAUGHTER GOT AN ITOUCH,

THE MISSUS GOT A DRESS;

WHY CAN'T I TOUCH SUPER-IPS?

JUST SHIP HIM THE SCREEN, BOY, AND YOU'LL HAVE IT MADE

FOR SHORING UP THE CALIFORNIA BALANCE OF TRADE.

THOSE THREE MILLION PIXELS WILL REALLY GO FAR:

YOU'LL BE A BLOGOSPHERIC STAR.

BE A STAR!

BE A STAR, BE A STAR, BE A BIG, BIG STAR;

SHOW THOSE HACK-NEYED BLOGGERS WHO YOU ARE.

Hear ye, hear ye! In the opinion of this court, this man's monitor is decrepit on accounta it's a cathode ray tube!"

Hey, I'm depraved on accounta I'm decrepit!"

So give him a new old di-liquid crystal. You!"

"Who, me? "You be the dilithium crystal doc."

MY-Y-Y-Y CRT'S A CHUNKER,

IT COST A HEFTY CHUNK,

BUT NOW IT'S JUST A CLUNKER,

AN AGING PIECE A' JUNK,

SO AT THE RISK OF RANKLING,

I'M ASKING YOU AGAIN:

WON'T YOU WILL ME YOUR FRICKIN' T210?

JIN OF DISPLAYBLOG, DON'T SQUANDER YOUR GEM,

ON SOME MORONIC LUDDITE WHO CAN'T SPELL I-B-M;

HIS LAPTOP's A THINKPAD, DESIGNED BY BIG BLUE,

BUT HIS DISPLAY'S A PIECE A' POO!

PIECE A' POO!

PIECE A' POO, THROUGH AND THROUGH, TO THE RED, GREEN, BLUE,

JUST A BLINKIN', STINKIN' PIECE A' POO!

In my opinion, this man doesn't need another CRT! High-resolution display deficiency is purely a problem of economics!"

"Hey, I may qualify for an economic stimulus!"

"So take him to his Congressman!"

"Which way?" "That way: Washington, DC!"

THO-O-O-SE MORTALS COULD TAKE PLEASURE, 

IN ANY OL' DISPLAY, 

THEIR EYES COULD NEVER TREASURE,

QUADRUPLE XGA! (4 x [1024x768])

IN TRUTH I'M ONLY ASKING,

WHAT COMMON SENSE DEMANDS:

LET ME TAKE THAT DIAMOND OFF YOUR HANDS.

CONGRESSMAN:

PUNDID LA-PIXEL, YOU'RE HELPIN' A BRO';

SO MAYBE CHICKS'LL RECKON THAT HE'S ROLLIN' IN DOUGH.

I FEEL YOUR GIFT WORKING, MY HEART HAS IMPROVED:

DEEP, DOWN INSIDE,

I'VE 

BEEN 

MOVED.

HE'S BEEN MOVED!

HE IS MOVED, HE IS MOVED,

HE IS DEEPLY MOVED,

LIKE HIS BOWELS, HE'S POSITIVELY MOVED!

HE MAY BE KINDA WACKO.

HE MAY BE KINDA SICK.

AS CURIOUS AS JACKO--

--CAVORTING WITH A CHICK.

HE MAY HAVE LOST HIS MOJO.

He MAY HAVE LOST HIS WITS;

BUT HIS SONG WILL FLOOD YOUR BLOG WITH HITS!

OH, JIN OF DISPLAYBLOG, WE'RE COUNTING ON YOU,

TO TENDER CHRISTMAS SPIRIT TO A JIN-LOVING JEW.

DON'T MAKE US FLY OUT THERE TO SING THIS AGAINNN:

POUR HIM A SHOT OF TEA 210!